A friend of mine is in the process of buying a house in town. I think she's in the middle of attorney review or just out of that stage. The other day I was on the phone with her and she made a comment about "the house we are not supposed to talk about." Now, I'm a homeowner myself. I think we may not have spread the word around before we were well into the process simply because - well - we were selfish and didn't want our friends to become our competitors in bidding on the house.

But it is unclear - at what point during the period leading up to a major life event does it become appropriate to discuss the specifics or make your news public? So how do you know when is the... more

What is meant by the term "Jewish Adoption?" It is, after all, the title of this blog. Jewish Adoption - in my humble opinion - refers to the adoption of a child by a Jewish couple [Edited to add: or single adult] with the intent that the child will be raised Jewish regardless of his or her religion at birth.

Adoptionblogs.com has a nice variety of blogs on different types and aspects of Adoption - which makes sense. Especially when you are first starting out and are looking for information on the different types of adoption, what your options really are and when you are looking to hear from "been there done that" parents, it's nice to see that there are lots of people out there to... more

A few years ago when we "got off the train" as I like to say, and stopped pursuing treatments for infertility, we turned to adoption. I know that we had talked about the possibility of adopting before we got married, as we suspected that I may have trouble conceiving, but nothing was ever carved in stone. I also don't recall having a serious sit-down discussion with my husband regarding our options post fertility-hell. I guess it was just obvious to both of us that we would go through the adoption process.

And yet, it's not so simple for many people. There is a huge pressure to have children within the Jewish community - we have all gotten the "So, when are you going to have a baby?"... more

Some thing that I haven't really touched upon is dealing with anti-Semitism when going abroad to complete an international adoption. Some people will report having no problems whatsoever, and others may find themselves in rather uncomfortable situations.

Whether a person is recognizable as a Jew from appearances or not really does not necessarily matter in terms of whether that individual will face some form of anti-Semitism in his or her lifetime. But how much should we hide who we are to 'protect' ourselves? And how appropriate is it really?

I remember being in school at times when things were not so good for the Jews around the world or in certain areas. During the days... more

Something that you may know by now about me is that I'm not exactly superstitious, but rather cautious - especially in terms of having children. I think we all know someone who was expecting a baby, ran out to register for things or even had a house full of baby items only to have to cancel the registry or return everything when the pregnancy was lost. Or those who had told everyone about the impending arrival of their newest adoption only to have the adoption fall through. We've all heard these stories - and maybe I've just heard one too many which makes me cautious when approaching the issue of adding children to my family.

My husband and I - on my request - didn't talk about a Hebrew... more

All week I look forward to Shabbat - the Jewish Sabbath - which starts on Friday evening (18 minutes before sundown) and ends one hour after sundown (when 3 stars come out in the sky). Shabbat is an experience. It's amazing. It's everything I could describe and different for everyone. And if you've never had a "Shabbat experience," then you probably don't understand what I'm talking about, but try to imagine. Shabbat is the day when things stop - when I finally get some peace, some really good family time and some reflection. I don't go to work, I don't check my email and I'm not disturbed by telemarketers because I don't answer my phone.

When I'm having the worst and longest week... more

I did not get into my first choice college. Granted, my first choice was a 'reach' school for me, but I felt that I still had a halfway decent shot. Instead, I was accepted into a very nice college - albeit my second choice.

And then I got psyched. I read more about the college I'd be attending. I got in touch with current and former students. I started to map out which clubs and organizations I'd be joining, and what places were nearby for me to explore on the weekends.

Most importantly, when people asked me where I was going, I did not say "Well I applied to this amazing school and was rejected. I'm crushed. Oh - and I guess I'll just have to go to this other school that... more

One of the things I remember best from my childhood is having a million books at my house. Okay, maybe it seemed to be a million. I had my own books, my sister had her own books, I suppose my parents had their own books, and then there were the collective books of the house. We were all readers - my father made me read an article a day from The New York Times starting at the age of seven. Shabbat afternoons were for reading - actually any day or night was for reading.

And while my parents censored what we watched,... more

So, how superstitious are you? Historically, Jews were stereotypically superstitious (say that three times fast), but then again so was the rest of the world. Nowadays, I think it's safe to say that the majority of the modern world has moved away from getting worried about black cats or bad dreams or what-not.

And yet. And yet I am superstitious about some things. I will not buy someone a baby present before they have actually had the baby. I will not wish someone a "mazel tov" (congratulations) before something has actually happened. And as much as we treat Adam as our own kid, I have a hard time referring to him as 'our son' when, at the moment, he is not ours.

The other... more

Going through the adoption process can be is exhausting and time consuming. At times it may seem like you're drowning in paperwork with no end in sight. But there is a light at the end of the tunnel! I promise! But there are a few things you will have to survive first. We - like all adoptive parents - had to have a homestudy as part of the approval process. And, becuase we are an open foster home with the State, we have a renewal inspection yearly, and (theoretically) monthly visits by our resource worker and case worker because we currently have a foster child in our care. And each time someone comes, I remember back to what we were doing in preparation for our homestudy.

How... more