Going through the adoption process, there may come a time where you look for an adoption support group in your community and can't seem to find one. An adoption support group is an asset to the community for many reasons and benefits parents as well as children involved.

You can set up an adoption support group in your community!

-- Is there an established group? Was there one at some time in the past that you can resurrect? These may be obvious questions to ask, but they are important to find answers to. If there is an established group already, I suggest you try it out, possibly talking to the leadership about taking an active role. It is generally difficult for a community to support more than one group on the same topic (unless you live in, say, Manhattan). Also, if there was a group at one time, you may want to find out who used to run it and approach them for tips or to see if they want to help restart the program.

-- Who will be in charge? Will it be lay leadership from the community or are you looking to bring in an outside agency? Look to your local Jewish Family Services or Jewish Federation for help. Also, the organization Stars of David is always looking to help people start a support group anywhere.

-- Do you need a budget? If you will be bringing in an outside agency, or need to pay for meeting space, or if you'll be sponsoring events or speakers, the answer is yes. However, some agencies may help you for no cost, meetings can be held at members' homes or a synagogue and some speakers will come without expecting a gratuity.

-- How often should meetings be held? I think that depends a lot on the number of people you get in your group, the type of events that you have, and how "into" the idea your members seem to be. Don't forget to have family events, not just meetings to talk about what challenges you are all facing (although those are just as important!).

-- Ask for help. This is the kind of thing that you can do if you are well organized and committed, but don't be a martyr and do it all on your own. It will be a much more rewarding (and successful) experience if several people are involved.